A Little Respect
To The Editor:

We often hear of problems that occur between women and their mothers-in-law. The common conception among the masses is that the motherin law is an evil person. Regardless of what she may do, or how kind she may be to her daughterin law, her description remains as such- especially in the view of the daughter- in-law.

Many daughters-in-law have forgotten the fact that their mother-in-law was a mother before she became a mother-in-law, and that the days will pass, and eventually, they will also become mothers in-law, perhaps to suffer in the same regard.

There are many factors that contribute to the bitter relationship that some women have with their mothers-in-law; some of which, on the part of the daughter-in-law, are a lack of respect for their mother-in-law. Respect for others is a fine quality to possess.

If your mother-in-law takes you to dinner on your birthday or a Christmas holiday and gives you a beautiful greeting card and numerous gifts and you don't even send her a Christmas greeting card or a birthday card, this is not respectful. If it is financially feasible for you to do so, it would be respectful to treat your mother-in-law with the same kindness, respect, thoughtfulness and generosity that she demonstrates to you. Only in this way can love and harmony engulf the relationship.

It is expected that the young show respect towards their elders, and thus, respecting ones mother-in-law is a must; this is due to the fact that not only is she an elder, but also because she was the reason for the daughter-in-law's husband being present in this world, as it was she that delivered him.

Often it is a daughter-in-law who creates a wedge between her husband and his mother. Such actions can cause a husband to feel that he must stand united with his wife against his own mother until finally the mother/son relationship erodes also. He then makes a choice to live his life alone with his wife without interacting with his mother. Such a life is a poisoned one, and one which contains little good fortune and many problems.

The daughter in-law must realize that she will eventually become a mother, and if it is of a son, then he will eventually marry, and she will therefore become a mother-in-law who would long for respect from her daughter-in-law.
Rose Marie Puleo Milcetic
Whitestone